Your poetry

[Charlotte Tracey]

I figured that some, if not most, people on here write a bit of their own poetry. I thought it would be fun to share some with everyone here. If you do write please post some of your work. If you love it brag about it, if you think it needs work then say so (maybe someone can give you a few tips).

Broken

I am broken
my paint is chipped
my strings are in knots
my dress is torn

The puppeteer is angry
because I can't follow
the commands he is yelling
Why are you so rough with me?

Why break me?
I do what you say
I do as you ask
So why me?

Choose another puppet
Make them do something
for once in their life
And leave me alone

I need to be fixed
I need fresh paint
I need new string
I need a new dress

I don't have time
to heal and be fixed
because you keep me so broken
and play so rough



Let me know what you think?

[Jeffery Scott Hartman]

i like them, they're good, but it's not about being "good", it's all about self-expression, even all the great writers had to have revisions to make the writings great

[judi]

please everyone check out and comment on my myspace blog.
my myspace is
www.myspace.com/judi_my_space

please!!
i would love unbiased opinions.

[Rebell]

i can see your silent disbelief
clutching on the black steel of your religion
your eyes betrayed you
long before they betrayed me

i know you know
i know you know
i can feel it in your eyes
i know you know

my roads a rainbow filled with pride

[Charlotte Tracey]

very nice. It has a nice strength to it that I really like.

[Connor Saxe]

Here are two, different sides of the same coin that is my mind. The first is my reaction to seeing a particular pair of students (boyfriend and girlfriend), who are more of 'an item' than anything else.

Walking through the crowd,
I get a sudden flash of anger,
teeth gritted,
Fist curls,
Nails bite into palms,

I suppress a low growl,
But rage still comes through,
A sharp hiss,
Narrowed eyes,
A caged will to do violence,

It could be disgust or resentment,
But that wouldn't be all of it,
A lingering jealousy,
Wish for connection,
Want of what I don't have,

Part of me wants to be calm,
Another tells me the feeling is good,
Ride the anger,
Don't think,

Walk away.

The second was born form my hopeless romanticism and love of urban decay as well as my interest in exploring those abandoned and hidden places of the city.

Amid the ruins they dance,
Silent and slow,
As if nothing is wrong,
With the world around them,
Like the dark old theater still has life,

They dance in the silence,
To music only they can hear,
On the stage alone,
Over broken glass,
From shattered windows and burnt out bulbs,

Her head on his shoulder,
Not a care in the world,
Beyond the tattered red curtains,
And empty felt chairs,
Just the two of them and no one else,

Dimly the light filters in,
Through holes in the collapsing roof,
Creating spotlights through the dust,
Shining upon them both,
And the graffitied posters on the walls,

In silence they move,
Through shadow and light,
Papers flutter around their feet,
Lost in the moment,
While amid the ruins they dance.

[adam]

ok here i go never did this but here i go

let me in

from a distance you
always looked at me
with rambling thoughts of
what we could be
friends we are now
but you comtemplate
somethimes about being more
feelings foe me emerge
only to be unhappily ignored
your dispirited past has
made it hard for a blissful future
i care and i dont wanna lose ya
you dont want me in
your world all the way
and i understand why
but i cant help but see
the distress in your eyes
i wanna ease your pain
but the big question is
will you let me
or will you unpurposely
continue to neglect me

[Charlotte Tracey]

I love them. Both are such great poems. The second one was my favorite. And I really liked the quote "nails bite into palms" from the first poem, the metaphor worked perfectly.

[Ericka Aguilar]

Lovely.
I think it's great that people are sharing their work here.


My own Ramblings....

"Fragment"

In class-
do you ever get up,
to return a pencil or a test and wonder-
is this my seat?
do I know better?

"Woman at the Ford"

It is the second, split in two-
when we see her hands.
Washed from the shore-
the sidewalk, the passenger seat-
or more likely the hospital bed..

When I was seven, she was young.
Cup after cup, she emptied into the
river. Water blue and pure, not frothing white.
I was young enough not to fear her-
and old enough still, to count her plaits.

In my twenties the fur on her coat-
was the white of winter flurries.
The river was frozen-
I was frozen, my own fear hot-
she put my ear to the ice.

Under, like eels, or trout rushing home,
the water was alive.
“It will carry you to me, someday-
it never goes away.”

[Charlotte Tracey]

very abstract, and done nicely. I've seen abstract poems butured so many times, it's nice to see someone do it right. it happens so rarely.

[shane polous]

i write a lot. it's a healthy way to get things out i think. anyway here's one of my more recent ramblings:

"freak"
i sense it between us
a tension a sickness
a world full of madness
and selfish intentions
and all of you built this
wall of defiance
my sick little vision
of sadness and silence

and i'm not like you
and i don't need to
feel acceptance
it's all so empty

and you pretend to hate me
cuz you have no choice
i understand that
you just can't be me

and i'm not like you

every day i'm far away
with all these words and
nothing to say and
full of decay and
something is growing
inside of this glass house
a disease of knowing
that i'll never get out

and i'm not like you
and i don't need to
feel acceptance
it's all so empty

and you pretend to hate me
cuz you have no choice
and i understand that
you just can't be me

and i'm not like you

and i don't like you

and i don't want to.

[adam]

dark angel



dark angel you saved

me from a life that

was not me

you brought me back

to who i'm suppose to be

i was lost and confused

i was dazed and abused

on the right path everyone

is so fake and used

i was the one devil

walking with the angels

in the light

but i realized that it

just was not right

they the beautiful people

tried to change me

they tried to keep me

in the light

so i prayed to you

to make everything right

you've turned my blood cold

and it feels good again

i will never leave you

because you are my true friend

dark angel the right path

is full of fake people that

try to fit in

i could care less

if i blend in

i am a outsider

i am a lost soul

thank you dark angel

for finally showing me

how to take control

[Charlotte Tracey]

I like. It's very straightforward, and the rhyme scheme works nicely.